As long as you’re happy . Happiness is all that’s important. I just want my kids to be happy. Happy wife, happy life. H-A-P-P-Y. Sing it, say it, live it. Believe in it. As long as happiness makes the world go round we will be on a stop – start merry go round for the rest of our lives.

We read about ways to be happy, how to make your spouse happy, 10 different ways to ensure your child’s happiness. It really seems as though without happiness life would suck!

What makes a person happy? For each of us it’s a different thing, circumstance, hobby or pastime. Happiness always depends on what is happening outside of us.

Wholeness is what happens inside of us. It’s a condition of the soul. Wholeness brings peace deep down inside, a state of wellbeing that has nothing to do with what we have or what we are doing. Wholeness comes from being complete, regardless of your circumstances. The dictionary definition of wholeness is ” a state of forming a complete and harmonious whole ; unity”. Another definition is “the state of being unbroken or undamaged.

Circumstances change all the time. Life breaks us and situations can threaten to suffocate our happiness, but if we are whole on the inside, that wholeness counteracts the outside stuff. We can only deal with our baggage if we are whole. If I am empty inside and I rely solely on what comes at me from the outside to fulfill me, I will constantly be in a state of expectation of my next fix. If I am whole on the inside, the sense of fulfillment is a constant and not reliant on anything external to keep it steady.

I don’t think Gods intention towards us has ever been happiness. Wholeness on the other hand is a condition experienced when we rely on Him and not our experiences to keep us going.

Burnout, exhaustion and depression often manifest in a person who is running from experiences to hobbies to friendships to keep busy and distracted.

When the lights go down and the tv is off, what direction do your thoughts go in?

If you are always planning your next round of entertainment then perhaps it’s time to seek wholeness and to stop chasing after constant happiness. A slice of cake can make me happy but an hour after the cake has gone down and I’m hungry again, the happiness of the experience has left the building and I’m looking for my next thing to make me happy.

Think of a beautifully wrapped Easter egg. The paper is shiny and brightly colored. Beneath the paper is a dull brown egg. As soon as you squash the egg it collapses because it’s hollow and the chocolate is thin. There is not much substance ( sadly though the calorie count is still high 😢) . Happiness only lasts as long as the experience that’s making you happy. Either that or as long as the tablet you took is effective.

Wholeness lasts a lifetime and is constant even when life wants to break us, and trust me, there will always be things that will do just that! Looking after your heart is godly wisdom – having a healthy heart is wholeness.

The best way of moving towards a whole and healthy heart is the painful step of self examination. What are you holding onto that is holding you back? What are you responsible for that you’re blaming others for? What habits do you have that restrict your life instead of enlarging it? What do you know of in your life, your mind and your social circle that is keeping you small or holding you captive? Take stock, write down an honest list of these things. Include the things that you really do not want to give up even though you know you should – those things, habits, friendships that you think you cannot live without even though living with them is toxic….. not easy, right ?

Joy is a byproduct of wholeness . Joy is not happiness but rather a state of being.

I would rather be filled with joy coming from a whole heart and soul than flitting from one thing to another trying to be happy all the time – quite frankly I do not have the energy to chase after temporary things that bring temporary relief to a hollow heart.

Purpose is another byproduct of wholeness. When we recognize our purpose we can overcome the mountains in the path in front of us. Vision is a beautiful thing that allows us to have a point of reference even when the lights go off and we cannot see ahead of us. There are so many examples of heroes that have seen the vision of where they were headed and ploughed on through the circumstances to get there. The circumstances did not magically disappear. The vision did not change because it was tough either. Heroes are heroes because they persevere. Isn’t it odd that the most whole people we know are often the ones who have been broken the most?

Brokeness and hardships were the cause of their steadfastness and the thing that drove them to complete their purpose. If they were looking only at being happy, the world would have missed out on their greatness and what it gave us. Imagine if Nelson Mandela was only focused on being happy? I shudder to think of where South Africa would be today if he hadn’t used his brokeness to overcome hatred and disfunction.

Can I challenge you to see happiness for what it is and to reach rather for the ultimate goal of wholeness? Life is as fleeting as what happiness offers but being whole will satisfy you deep down and grow a version of you that you never imagined possible!

“So receive my correction no matter how hard it is to swallow, for wisdom will snap you back into place— her words will be invigorating life to you.

So above all, guard the affections of your heart, for they affect all that you are. Pay attention to the welfare of your innermost being, for from there flows the wellspring of life.”

‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭4:13, 23‬ ‭TPT‬‬